21 For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. 22  But if I am to live on in the flesh, this will mean fruitful labor for me; and I do not know what I will choose. 23 But I am hard-pressed between the two, having the desire to depart and be with Christ, for that is very much better, 24 yet to remain on in the flesh is more necessary for your sake. 25 And convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all for your progress and joy in the faith, 26 so that your reason for boasting may abound in Christ Jesus in me, through my coming to you again.

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Paul continued from his earlier point—that “Christ would be magnified in his body, whether by life or by death.” Then, follows the line that has echoed through generations: For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.

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Paul expressed a real tension. 

To remain alive means fruitful labor for Christ. He would continue pouring out his life for the progress and joy of the church. Remaining was worth the toil and suffering if it served others. For Paul, to live is to devote himself fully to Christ and His work.

But he also longed to depart and be with Christ for that is far better.

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I recall a time when the only prayer I could ever utter was, “God, I don’t want to wake up anymore.”  Burdened by failure and uncertainty, I struggled to move forward. I hit a low point asking God, “Why?“

I wrestled with this thought: How can life be worth living if it only gets harder? 

In those moments, it felt easier to think that it is better to be with Christ—to rest and be free from suffering.

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And yet Paul was convinced that remaining was more necessary for others.

He knew this meant remaining in continued imprisonment and suffering. From an earthly perspective, his desire to be with Christ makes sense — why would anyone want to stay in suffering? 

But it’s one thing to desire Christ. It’s another thing to seek escape. 

Paul’s life was driven by purpose, not by relief.

He considered what was necessary – to continue persevering despite his ordeal. Though longing to be with Christ, Paul still had work to do. 

Paul did not seek escape. He sought to be faithful to the finish (2 Timothy 4:7-8). Even in death, his aim was to gain Christ. 

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I have felt the pull to escape the uncertainties of life. The quest for certainty can quietly be an agonizing idol to my soul. Yet my struggles are not comparable to Paul’s, and far from the sufferings of Christ.

Paul’s life shows that both life and death find their meaning in Christ. To live is not merely to endure, but to labor for Him. To die is not to escape, but to be with Him. And His promises are sure.

So, I can remain.

I can continue, even in uncertainty.
I can live through the tension and be faithful to the finish —

Because of Christ.

Indeed, this remains true: To live is Christ and to die is gain. 

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Prayer:

Dear Father, 

May I desire Christ above all — in life and in death. May I continue in fruitful labor for Christ no matter what life throws at me. And when my time comes, may I gain Christ and glorify You to the end.